2018-12-21 – Reaching for the cannabis.

I’m feeling jumpy today, kind of like I have restless legs syndrome, but throughout my entire body.  It’s most unpleasant and uncomfortable, and has me reaching for the cannabis very early in the day (I generally don’t take any cannabis before the evening).   The cannabis doesn’t actually make the jumpy feeling go away, but it does help me to tolerate it.

I’m working on my weekly vlog today (as is usual for a Friday) so the morning is spent researching and writing a script, and the afternoon is spent filming myself and editing the resulting raw footage into a short video.  My voice seems better than last week, although I do have to make a conscious effort to enunciate clearly and not slur my words.  I have a little more tremor breaking through my DBS than is usual, which makes it difficult for me to use the trackpad, and this slows me down considerably when editing.  I briefly consider increasing the right hand voltage on my neurostimulator, but resist the temptation because I’m fearful of provoking my eating issues (experienced some time ago now, but which I believe to be linked to over-stimulation – at least, I have stopped biting the inside of my mouth with such violence since I reduced the voltage on my neurostimulator).

I’m not in my usual rush to finish my vlog and get it uploaded and published – my wife is going shopping with her youngest son’s wife to buy the food for our Christmas dinner, so she will be very late home this evening.  I do, however, manage to publish my video at about the usual time, regardless of the lack of pressure, which leaves me plenty of time to have a quick tidy-up, light the fire and run the vacuum cleaner around downstairs.

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