2018-12-11 – A spare part.

I’m still feeling like a spare part at the moment – surplus to requirements.  I really need to give myself a kick up the backside to jolt me out of my current mood, but it’s so difficult to do so – far easier to sit here on the sofa and let it all wash over me.  My son is coming to stay with us for a few days next week, and I really don’t want him to see me this way – hopefully it will have passed over by then.

I try to analyse why I feel so useless, and I come to the conclusion that it is rooted in my lack of motivation, which is at least as frustrating for me as it must be for my long-suffering wife.

I am motivated (by the dog) to go dog walking this morning and this afternoon, and am motivated (by the cold) to split a basketful of logs, carry them into the lounge and light the fire (a couple of hours earlier than usual).

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