2016-08-30 – Camera shy

Awake early (5am) with dyskinesia again this morning – not as bad as it was yesterday, though, and I get back to sleep for another couple of hours.

My wife is going shopping for a suitcase in Norwich today, and I’m going to do some more work on the videos for my YouTube channel.  I will probably shoot some footage while I have the house to myself – I can’t do pieces to camera while I’m being watched.  I hate doing it in the first place, because I am, basically, camera shy.  I hate the look of myself on video, and I hate the sound of my voice even more.  There’s nothing for it, though, because if I don’t do it then nobody will.  Most of my time is taken up with preparation: the script takes me ages to write and transfer to the teleprompter app on my iPad;  I position the camera so that can I get the shots that I want, and then make sure that everything in the shot is neat and tidy – nothing worse than going to all of the trouble of filming a shot and getting it onto the computer only to notice the crumpled Lidl bag in the corner of the room (yes, it did happen!);  I position the iPad on a stand behind the camera so that (hopefully) I will appear to be looking at the camera while I’m reading the script from the teleprompter;  make sure the lighting is right;  set up the radio microphone;  make sure the dog is out of the way;  vacuum downstairs;  plan the shots and make sure that the props that I require are close to hand.  By the time I’m ready to roll, it’s after 2pm!  Action!

It’s coming up for 6pm by the time I’ve shot all of the footage that I had planned and start to import it to my MacBook.  My symptoms today haven’t really interfered with my filming today, although I have done a number of re-takes when I noticed the tremor in my head or my hands.  Tremor hasn’t been quite so bad as it was yesterday, but it’s still significant, as is my dystonia.  The dyskinesia seems to have abated a little, which is a big relief – I really don’t like it at all.  My balance isn’t as bad as yesterday, and so my walking seems a little better (less stilted) today.  My mood continues to be fairly positive, and I am getting things done.  I have a little more energy today, too, although I’m feeling pretty bushed now (9pm).

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